In the absence of being able to read people’s minds the next best thing at our disposal has long been body language. Studies show that unfortunately a lot of us are really bad at this and particularly men. When going on dates with perfect strangers (as so many of us do these days with the advent of online dating) we often rely heavily on what another person’s body language is saying to us and believe to have become expert readers of body language.
But as it so happens it turns out that men are really bad at reading body language, in fact worse than women! Several studies carried out have proven that this is the case but the reasons behind why men might be worse at this than women remain a mystery!
In the meantime though here are some tips based on these studies:
- Try to greet her face-on.
It turns out that through some evolutionary quirk related to being on the alert to prey in the wilds, women do not like being greeted or approached from behind, say with a tap on the shoulder. Make sure you come round and are face-to-face when you first greet a woman you’re interested in.
- Nod
It turns out that men and women nod for different reasons which in turn means that they read each other’s nods differently. Women nod to show that they’re listening, whilst men tend to nod to show they agree. So if you want to let a special lady know that you’re paying attention to what she’s saying and like her, get your nodding going!
- Touching
Touching can be problematic as we all know and of course it’s one that has to be judged on a case by case basis as well as considered in terms of context. However, it’s safe to say that there are a few basic things that can be taken into consideration. Firstly, women touching a man should not be interpreted as interest. Women touch men in order to show connection and engagement, something that men often misinterpret. However, often reaching out quite directly and touching a forearm can often be a sign of connection. What should men do? Don’t offer touching unless she initiates.
Whilst the world of nonverbal communication and body language can seem like a maze, it’s also fair to say that as long as you pay attention to the other person, most of the woes of miscommunication should evaporate.
